The Hancock-Henderson Quill, Inc.



The Wisdom Of Barnyard Bruke: "Classified Ads, Senior Discounts"

Greetings to ever one in Western Illinois and surround'n areas.

I'm a hope'n the rain fell generously upon ya as they moved through these parts the last few days.

Is in hopes, if'n ya didn't get enough rain, maybe there was some satisfaction in look'n off in the distance and watch'n a neighbor get a good shower.

Classified ads sometimes can be a source of humor. The follow'n ads showed up in U.K. newspapers. See if'n ya thinks British humor hits the spot.

"FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER

8 years old, Hateful little bugger Bites!

FREE PUPPIES

1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.

FREE PUPPIES.

Mother is a Kennel Club Registered German Shepherd. Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.

Also, 1 gay bull for sale.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!

Must sell washer and dryer 100.

WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.

Worn once by mistake.

Call Stephanie.

FOR SALE BY OWNER:

Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes, Excellent condition. 200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.

On the serious side of things, how many of you older folk are familiar with senior discounts that are available, many of them start'n at the young age of 50?

Here's a list that may be useful fer ya or your friends:

RESTAURANTS:

Applebee's: 15% off with Golden Apple Card (60+)

Arby's: 10% off (55+)

Ben & Jerry's: 10% off (60+)

Bennigan's: discount varies by location (60+)

Bob's Big Boy: discount varies by location (60+)

Boston Market: 10% off (65+)

Burger King: 10% off (60+)

Chick-Fil-A: 10% off or free small drink or coffee (55+)

Chili's: 10% off (55+)

CiCi's Pizza: 10% off (60+)

Denny's: 10% off, 20% off for AARP members (55+)

Dunkin' Donuts: 10% off or free coffee (55+)

Einstein's Bagels: 10% off baker's dozen of bagels (60+)

Fuddrucker's: 10% off any senior platter (55+)

Gatti's Pizza: 10% off (60+)

Golden Corral: 10% off (60+)

Hardee's: $0.33 beverages everyday (65+)

IHOP: 10% off (55+)

Jack in the Box: up to 20% off (55+)

KFC: free small drink with any meal (55+)

Krispy Kreme: 10% off (50+)

Long John Silver's: various discounts at locations (55+)

McDonald's: discounts on coffee everyday (55+)

Mrs. Fields: 10% off at participating locations (60+)

Shoney's: 10% off Sonic: 10% off or free beverage (60+)

Steak "n Shake: 10% off every Monday & Tuesday (50+)

Subway: 10% off (60+)

Sweet Tomatoes: 10% off (62+)

Taco Bell: 5% off; free beverages for seniors (65+)

TCBY: 10% off (55+)

Tea Room Cafe: 10% off (50+)

Village Inn: 10% off (60+)

Waffle House: 10% off every Monday (60+)

Wendy's: 10% off (55+)

White Castle: 10% off (62+)

RETAIL & APPAREL

Banana Republic: 10% off (50+)Bealls: 20% off first Tuesday of each month (50+)Belk's: 15% off first Tuesday of every month (55+)Big Lots: 10% offBon-Ton Department Stores: 15% off on senior discount days (55+)C.J. Banks: 10% off every Wednesday (60+)Clarks: 10% off (62+)Dress Barn: 10% off (55+)Goodwill: 10% off one day a week (date varies by location)Hallmark: 10% off one day a week (date varies by location)Kmart: 20% off (50+)Kohl's: 15% off (60+) Modell's Sporting Goods: 10% off Rite Aid: 10% off on Tuesdays & 10% off prescriptions Ross Stores: 10% off every Tuesday (55+)The Salvation Army Thrift Stores: up to 50% off (55+)Stein Mart: 20% off red dot/clearance items first Monday of every month (55+)

GROCERY:

Albertson's: 10% off first Wednesday of each month (55+)

American Discount Stores: 10% off every Monday (50+)

Compare Foods Supermarket: 10% off every Wednesday (60+)

DeCicco Family Markets: 5% off every Wednesday (60+)

Food Lion: 6% off every Monday (60+)Fry's Supermarket: free Fry's VIP Club Membership & 10% off every Monday (55+)Great Valu Food Store: 5% off every Tuesday (60+)Gristedes Supermarket: 10% off every Tuesday (60+)Harris Teeter: 5% off every Tuesday (60+)Hy-Vee: 5% off one day a week (date varies by location)Kroger: 10% off (date varies by location)Morton Williams Supermarket: 5% off every Tuesday (60+)The Plant Shed: 10% off every Tuesday (50+)Publix: 5% off every Wednesday (55+)Rogers Marketplace: 5% off every Thursday (60+)Uncle Guiseppe's Marketplace: 5% off (62+)

TRAVEL:

Airlines:

Alaska Airlines: 10% off (65+)American Airlines: various discounts for 65 and up (call before booking for discount)

Continental Airlines: no initiation fee for Continental Presidents Club & special fares for select destinations

Southwest Airlines: various discounts for ages 65 and up (call before booking for discount)

United Airlines: various discounts for ages 65 and up (call before booking for discount)

U.S. Airways: various discounts for ages 65 and up (call before booking for discount)

Rail:

Amtrak: 15% off (62+)

Bus:

Greyhound: 5% off (62+)

Trailways Transportation System: various discounts for ages 50+

Car Rental:

Alamo Car Rental: up to 25% off for AARP members

Avis: up to 25% off for AARP members

Budget Rental Cars: 10% off; up to 20% off for AARP members (50+)

Dollar Rent-A-Car: 10% off (50+)

Enterprise Rent-A-Car: 5% off for AARP members

Hertz: up to 25% off for AARP members

National Rent-A-Car: up to 30% off for AARP members

Over Night Accommodations:

Best Western: 10% off (55+)Cambria Suites: 20%-30% off (60+)

Clarion Motels: 20%-30% off (60+)

Comfort Inn: 20%-30% off (60+)

Comfort Suites: 20%-30% off (60+)

Econo Lodge: 20%-30% off (60+)

Hampton Inns & Suites: 10% off when booked 72 hours in advance

Holiday Inn: 10%-30% off depending on location (62+)

Hyatt Hotels: 25%-50% off (62+)

InterContinental Hotels Group: various discounts at all hotels (65+)

Mainstay Suites: 10% off with Mature Traveler's Discount (50+); 20%-30% off (60+)

Marriott Hotels: 15% off (62+)

Motel 6: 10% off (60+)

Myrtle Beach Resort: 10% off (55+)

Quality Inn: 20%-30% off (60+)

Rodeway Inn: 20%-30% off (60+)

Sleep Inn: 20%-30% off (60+)

ACTIVITIES & ENTERTAINMENT:

AMC Theaters: up to 30% off (55+)

Bally Total Fitness: up to $100 off memberships (62+)

Busch Gardens Tampa, FL: $3 off one-day tickets (50+)

Carmike Cinemas: 35% off (65+)Cinemark/Century Theaters: up to 35% off

U.S. National Parks: $10 lifetime pass; 50% off additional services including camping (62+)

Regal Cinemas: 30% offRipley's Believe it or Not: @ off one-day ticket (55+)

SeaWorld Orlando, FL: $3 off one-day tickets (50+)

NOW, there you have it, then. Quite a list wouldn't ya say. But, remember, ya have to ASK fer your discount, they generally don't volunteer.. no ask, no discount.

Keep up your strong will and maintain a cheery disposition.

Help someone feel good about be'n alive!

Keep on Smile'n

Catch ya Later!

BARNYARD BRUKE